Ready. Set. Fitness

by Elena on April 16, 2012 in Fitness

Have you ever been looking forward to something so very much that you started a count down to prepare for it’s arrival?

That is how I feel, as I sit here, with one week left until my medical ALL CLEAR to resume exercise after my hysterectomy in March.

I am one week until my body can resume full activity, working out, sweating, feeling the rush of endorphins and confidence that comes from a great workout.

Ready.

Set.

Fitness!

Except of course that it is not going to work that way. After six weeks of NO activity other than the walk around the neighborhood and the day to day activity that comes from working and running errands, my body is not going to be able to jump back into exercising all of a sudden. Or at least, it will not be able to if I want to avoid injuries.

The truth is that I am just a bit fearful of starting to exercise again. Of wanting so desperately to feel strong, to feel fit, and yet, failing. Failing because my body is not up to what I would like it to do. Failing because I let excuses get in the way.

That might sound crazy. But the pressure to get back into fitness after this six week hiatus feels extremely high. So high that I know how easy it would be to sink into frustration at not getting there fast enough. It is all within my control this time. It is up to me. Only me.

While the knowledge that it is up to me should get my motors running and make me feel in control. It doesn’t. It instead reminds me of the times in the past when I have not met my fitness goals. When I have failed myself in training or at a race.

Friends have told me that I have inspired them to start running. Others have appreciated my honesty with my ups and downs telling me they have learned from my reflections. But me? It is hard to take your own advice sometimes. It is hard to see myself in my words, knowing that I need to let go of all that was.

The fact of the matter is that this was not just a six week fitness hiatus. I have been out of fitness commission really since last September. I have dabbled here and there, but my habits were off. My consistency wavered. I talked a great game of letting go of the runner that I used to be, of the distances that used to feel easy.  I have talked of secret weapons and tricks to get back on track.

But I have not taken my own advice. Or maybe, it is that I have not BELIEVED in my own advice.

Whatever the case, as I mentally prepare for the green light to flash, signaling my medical permission to start again, I feel something happening. I feel an energy brewing. Much like I felt when I decided to train for my first marathon in 2001 at a time when I could barely run three miles. Much like I decided to train for a triathlon after having spent twelve years being afraid of riding my bike.

Whatever it is, I am not about to let it go to waste. Yes, it is going to be hard to get back into a fitness routine. Yes, my body is going to behave differently and progress will be slow. Yes, I am going to have bad days where I wonder if it is all worth it.  But….there will be good days too. More and more of them as I keep going.

I read a great expression today on a friend’s site, as she shared her experience of competing in a Tough Mudder.

And I realized…she is right. No matter what personal obstacle course we are on. Whether we are starting over or starting anew. The past does not matter.

ready set fitness | Ciao Mom

Come back tomorrow to see how I lay out my five step plan to ease my body back into fitness after my surgery. Because today? Today is all about building my mental strength. Forgiving my body for not being what is was and moving on. Moving on to a new body. A stronger me.

Ciao Mom

 

Have you heard? Next week, on April 23rd, Just.Be.Enough. is hosting a special prompt: Change the Conversation. Read all about it and get ready to add your voice!

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{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }

Miz April 16, 2012 at 6:33 am

babtysteps, Friend.
And rely on that muscle memory too :-)
it wont fail you.

HUGS FROM TX.

Reply

Elena April 16, 2012 at 10:40 pm

Thanks friend. I am counting on that muscle memory–and yes, very small steps indeed. It is all about the long haul.

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Tina @ Best Body Fitness April 16, 2012 at 6:49 am

I would undoubtedly have the same sorts of feelings – wanting to do so much, getting frustrated when my body isn’t there yet, and then having the desire to get discouraged and give up. When I get in situations like that, I try to think of what advice I would give someone else in the same situation…and then do my dang best to listen to it myself. Stay strong! Which I’m sure you can and will. You’ve already been strong through so much. This is just a tiny bit more to push through and then come out on top. :)

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Kir April 16, 2012 at 5:34 pm

I sit in quiet awe of women who love to work out, who enjoy the sweating and the work. I hate every moment of it , even when I was doing it on my own..not being made to do it. I am very proud of you and your dedication to it…and I know that even if it takes a few weeks/months to get your body back in it’s routine of working out, you are going to be great..because of the desire in your heart and head. GO get em!!!!

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Adrienne April 16, 2012 at 9:22 pm

This is my first time here. Your writing is inspiring! You’re right. The past does not define us! Thank God! Good luck getting back into fitness. Slow and steady wins the race. :)

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Miss Marina Star April 16, 2012 at 9:47 pm

As a runner who has fallen off the track, I so sympathize with not taking your own advice. I have been so up and down lately that I fear never being able to get back to how I was training before. I wish you luck on your new fitness journey. I’m sure you’ll be fantastic, your mental preparation is already stellar!

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Mike April 16, 2012 at 10:25 pm

You already have it in you. Don’t look up at how much of the mountain you have to climb but look down at how much of it you have already climbed. You have proven in the past you could do things at the time seemed impossible so this shouldn’t be any different.

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Stephanie Goetz April 16, 2012 at 10:35 pm

Love this! As GI Joe used to say “Knowing is half the battle”. Sharpen that mental grit and know you are not alone in this. You are also a lot stronger between the ears than you may give yourself credit for. Let that storm brew, sistah! The winds are changing and you’re going to face it head on. I look forward to following the journey! High five! xo

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Elena April 16, 2012 at 10:37 pm

Thank you Stephanie for the inspiration!! And thanks, it has been a long time since I have felt this level of inner excitement. Off to brew :)

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cmichaelsny April 18, 2012 at 12:27 pm

It’s also the fastest way to get in shape. Everybody-and every body-is different, and breaking away from a traditional workout routine and creating your own program may be the best path to a healthier life. Ready…get set…sweat

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Kelly April 19, 2012 at 9:08 am

Focus.
One step at a time
away from the past
and moving you into the future.

xoxo

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