One year ago, I was gearing up to reclaim my fitness. I was prepped, motivated, and ready to find my way back to my body, back to a fit me that was confident and strong, and healthy.
I bought the P90x system, equipped our workout room with a pull up bar and bought new flooring mats so that I would not ruin my knees during the crazed Tony Horton led workouts.
I did the workouts. For a while. And then I stopped. With the excuse that I needed to increase my running mileage to prepare for some races and my first triathlon, I left the workout dvds for spin class, the pool, the treadmill, and the running path.
Although I did train in the late winter and the spring, it was inconsistent. I was not on a solid road to becoming the mean that I knew I could be.
I kept plugging away, inconsistent workout after inconsistent workout, and even trained for a second triathlon. I completed my Iron Girl sprint triathlon feeling proud of myself, but not feeling as strong as I would have liked. I knew in my heart of hearts that I had not been as disciplined, as focused, and my body…well it just “was.”
With an elbow surgery that took me out of commission for almost a month post triathlon, by the time October rolled around, my body was not just unfit…but it was unhealthy. Tired, lethargic, I would get on the treadmill or on my indoor bike trainer on the weekends, wondering my body was barely fitting into my clothes.
It was no wonder. I was not working out. I was eating healthy foods in servings that were too large, and unhealthy foods in lots of small portions that added up over the day. And the wine. And the sip of Baileys later in the evening.
And now…. now I sit with a looming surgery that will not just take me out of commission from what was supposed to be my first international distance triathlon. I sit knowing that if I go into surgery with my body in the shape that it is….recovery will be slow, and not pretty. Not only that, but going through a surgery that threatens to take away the very systems that make me feel feminine and girly….will be gone, and I will left with an emotional void that I have not fully accepted.
So now…..now I only have one choice. Actually, it is not really a choice. It is a necessity. I must take control. I must find a way, baby step after baby step, to build a new foundation of fitness. A new foundation of healthy choices that will lead, over time, with a LOT of effort, to the fit and healthy me I KNOW I can be.
The first step was to reactivate my Weight Watchers membership. The membership where I had been paying for who knows how long to track my food digitally….but never did. The membership that I will now fully take advantage of, with in person meetings and weigh-ins. The membership that once upon a time got my to my lifetime goal. I do not expect to get there quickly or easily…it will take time. But it WILL happen.
The second step is to get back into a consistent fitness routine. Early morning workouts, before work, when there is nothing else pulling at me.
Step after step. Good day after bad day, followed by good day. Taking control, of me, of my fitness journey, of my health.
In related news, I am a community leader for Get Your Body Back 2012, organized by Tots2Tweens. Would love for you to stop by and be a part of this great community! The truth is that I do a better job as a resource to others than I do for myself…I am hopeful that just like mentoring new teachers has helped me strengthen my own teaching skills, serving as a leader to others on their fitness journey, will help solidify my journey and commitment as well.